Noses

On Tuesdays I volunteer at the boys school. I got to school today and Camden was not in his class. I noticed the bathroom pass was on his desk so I knew where he was. 10 minutes later, I see him come back, get a pencil and leave again. He did not see me. I wait, and wait and in walks Camden, tears in his eyes. I thought he got sick but I see his nose is bleeding. I ask if that is why he is crying. He tells me no, that he put something up his nose. A piece of tin foil!? Then he took a pencil to the bathroom to try and get it out. His nose kept bleeding. I tried to get him to blow it out. Nothing. He cried asking if he was going to die. Um, not from tin foil. I told him we will have to do a sinus rinse to get it out (worked well when Torrin decided to stuff corn up his nose-twice) I figured after book club, I would take him home and do a rinse but his teacher sent him to the office. They tried calling me on my cell even though his teacher told them I was in the building. My phone does not work in there so Bryan had to come and do the rinse. Camden said he got it out but did not see it. Hopefully it is not still in there. Never a dull moment....

Life

Have I mentioned how bad I am with this blog thing? I am on the computer a lot, but do I take the time to write? Nope. Maybe 2012 will be better for this :)

Several things have happened lately that I am obsessing about. The main one being cancer. Bryan's friend has a matter of days to live. He is only 42. I can't even imagine being told I have days to live. He has three kids and a wife. Imagine being his wife, knowing you will be a single parent soon. I would cry-constantly. I admire that he has such a strong faith and that he thinks he is going to see God. Maybe he will and it will be fantastic. Did you hear what Steve Jobs' last words were? He was staring off into the distance saying Oh Wow. Oh Wow. Oh Wow. Part of me thinks that is pretty awesome. Maybe he was going to a place I am uncertain of, but maybe it is fantastic. I hope so.

On October 24th, my ex boyfriend passed away from Leukemia. Despite the fact that we did not last as a couple, we managed to remain friendly. We talked awhile ago about how he was diagnosed with Lymphoma but he was in remission. Last April he got diagnosed with Leukemia and ever since, he has been fighting. Constantly smiling in his pictures, making jokes, etc. 6 months after he was diagnosed, he passed away. He was only 31. In the short time I spent with him, I have a lot of fond memories of him. He was a carefree person with so much talent. He made me laugh and no matter what we did, we had fun. It did not work out between us, but that does not mean I wished him any ill will. When we were breaking up, he told me he wanted excitement. Constant excitement and passion. I told him that was not realistic. What he should look for is someone who is going to love him unconditionally, be there for him in good times and in bad, and who would take care of him even if he got sick with a life threatening disease. Ironic isn't it? I just can't believe he is gone. I feel terrible for his family. He was larger than life and his family adored him. He was always the center of attention at family events and I can't imagine how they are coping. Part of me wondered if I should go to his funeral but I could not bring myself to do it. I think I would feel out of place and my sadness for those still very close to him would be heartbreaking.

Of course these events bring up the constant thought of death and what will happen if I get sick, or how I will be when my loved ones die. So many people have cancer. Some people fight it, some people die. Why are some people sick, and others are not? I wish I had a strong faith and that I 100% believed in heaven. If I knew that it existed, it would be easier. But that is what faith is-believing in what you can't see. I am not sure how this will change. I pray every night that those who are close to me are happy and healthy. I hope no one else gets sick, but it is bound to happen. I wish I could not perseverate on these negative thoughts, but I do and I hope I can change that.

I have so many things to be thankful for. I am blessed in so many ways. I guess that is why I am always waiting for something bad to happen. Something has to go wrong, doesn't it? By worrying about it, I feel like I am preparing myself for it, but nothing I do will prepare me for anything in my opinion. We shall see what time brings. I wish I were a live in the moment person, but I am not. I long to be that person. Maybe someday.

Well, that was a downer of a post. Happier things to come in the future.

D

Where did 35 years go?

People always say time flies, especially the older you get. Well, time is flying and somehow, I will be 35 tomorrow. Wasn't I just 16 waiting to drive? Wasn't I just counting the days until I could go out to the bars?  Didn't I just have my 30th birthday? How is it that 35 years have passed me by? I had kind of a hard time when I turned 30, and I didn't think much about 35 until today. Today was an all around kind of a crap day. Bryan is out of town so I thought wahoo! I get to sleep in. What happens? Mickey starts barking at 6:30 a.m. then what I thought was our smoke detector started going off. I took it apart, changed the battery-no luck. Still loud beeping. I took the battery out, so I thought that would solve the problem. Well, it is connected through wires to the house so I had to unhook the wires. STILL beeping. I swore it was possessed. Turns out I am an idiot and it was the carbon monoxide detector beeping. After all that, all I had to do was unplug something.

Since I was awake, I texted my hair gal to say she could come early if she wanted. She did, and after she did my hair there was a big chunk of white blonde. It looked strange. She redid the piece, which then lead us to more pieces that needed to be redone. It took a long time. Oh well, it is done.

I have been in a crafty mode lately thanks to Pinterest and decided I needed to spray paint something. I was warned it would be addicting but it was fun to try something different and something I could say, yep, I painted that....with a can. I had bought two frames I loved at Hobby Lobby. They were perfect, but I bought them at different times so the paint color on them did not look like they were the same, even if they were supposed to be. They had been on my mantle for months, with the pictures of random people in them. It bugged me everyday so I decided to do something about it. Well, being the impatient person that I am, did I let them dry between coats? Nope. Did I pick them up before they were dry? Yep. Did this totally jack them up? Yep. One was so bad I had to go buy another one yesterday. While I was doing these frames, I thought why not do the other frames I got on clearance and make them black? Simple enough right? Uh, no. The amount of time and money I have spent on this project is ridiculous. I could have gone out and bought new frames. I thought I was being frugal, but with primer, then spray paint, then a top coat, that right there is $15. Then the time I have used to do this is insane. But hopefully they will turn out nice and I can finally put pictures in them and up on the mantle.

Tonight I decided to get out the Halloween decorations and well, I realized I have some serious fugly stuff. Some is cute, but the cute stuff is something I bought last year. The other stuff probably needs to go. So not my style. I have so many ideas, and I bought a ridiculous amount of vinyl for the Cricut but have I opened the box of it yet? Nope. Have I used any of the crap I buy? Not really. Unless it is spray paint. That goes so fast....kind of like time.

Back to my original topic of my birthday being tomorrow (which also happens to be Mexico's Independence Day). It sucks that I will be 35 and my husband is 32. He sees it as not a big deal, but he already has two kids. He bought a house. He has a great job. I am kind of stuck. I am not afraid to admit I am in therapy. I love my therapist but she kind of broke up with me yesterday. We will see what happens with that. So many people are in this funk lately. People are unhappy in their marriages, people are questioning their lives. I am one who is questioning my life too. I had goals of getting married and being a stay at home mom. Now that I am those things, what now? What ultimate goal do I have? I am in a state of indifference. I am kind of numb to everything. I guess that is better than being sad all the time like I was years ago. I know I have a good life and three men (and a cute puppy) who love me. I have a fantastic family. I am blessed in so many ways, but I keep waiting for the next big thing. They say life is not a dress rehearsal-I just wish I could live that way. This entry is taking a different turn than I expected. I guess I will continue to ramble.

I am not looking forward to tomorrow. There are no big plans, and a huge problem I have with life is I always have expectations of how things "should" be. My therapist told me there are no "shoulds' in life-it is what it is. Nothing "should" be a certain way but I have expectations and with expectations comes disappointment. I know 35 is just another birthday, but to me it is huge. I am super excited to go to Disneyland next weekend so I need to focus on that. Bryan asked me what I wanted to do tomorrow-I don't know. I am just another person, and birthdays do happen every year, but I want to have an awesome day and do something fun, but I have no idea what. I miss the days of birthday parties, getting things in the mail, getting presents. So far, I have got one card (thanks Mom and Dad!) but that is it. Torrin thinks it is his birthday tomorrow. He expects to get presents. He is going to be bummed.

The rest of today kind of sucked. Man I am all over the place. I vacuumed the whole house, cleaned the downstairs guest room and bathroom since we had a friend staying with us, cleaned the boys bathroom, did laundry, changed some sheets, cleaned out my sock drawer and some other drawers, and got through some things in my closet. I hung new curtains which are still far too short but the next size up is way too big. The lights in our closet went out, the frames got even more jacked, etc. I know these are all simple, stupid things but I was already bummed that I was turning 35 tomorrow. Oh and I read how much fertility rates go down after you turn 35. Fantastic. Man I am crabby.

Well, Bryan will be landing soon-I really need to update this more. Life is crazy with kids. There is something almost every night. I know I have neglected friendships and that people are mad at me which sucks, but I don't know how to fit everything in. Monday nights we have swimming, Tuesdays will be basketball, Thursday is Cub Scouts and Saturdays are more basketball. I volunteer on Tuesdays and I have to clean this big house. This weekend we have a Cub Scout thing on Saturday morning, then a party Saturday afternoon, then 2 birthday parties on Sunday which means I had to cancel on the Bunco group that just added me to the group. I am already disappointing people who just asked me to be part of their group. So frustrating.

This crabby 34 year old is signing off. It is my birthday on the east coast. I don't think I was born until 3:30 though or somewhere around there, so I have at least 14 more hours of being 34, right?

The latest

So with my recent addiction to Pinterest, I came across a saying that was "Never give up on something you can't go a day without thinking about."  Well, I think about a lot of things that I definitely should give up on, but I took it as a sign that it meant my blog. I want to write. All the time. It is just that time does not permit, nor does my wacky health issues lately. I need to get better about this. Seriously. Don't I say this all the time?

Today I am having another craft sale since the neighborhood is having a sale. It has not been nearly as successful as the one I had months ago. Oh well, it is money I did not have before and I hope more people come tomorrow. Fingers crossed! I have so much stuff I need to get rid of. it is overwhelming. We have been donating a ton of things but the thought of how much we spent for stuff is driving me nuts. I guess it is beneficial for the tax break.

We finally got everything out of the town home, and now it sits in our basement staring at me, begging me to unpack it. It is so overwhelming. I don't know where to begin so I just continue to look at it. You never realize how much crap you have until you have to move it, and man, I have a lot of crap.  The garage sale today makes me think I should have kept some of the stuff I donated. People want random things today. Kids toys, jewelry, etc. Oh well. Nothing I can do about it now. A lady just told me I had the best sale of anyone so let's hope people come. I posted it on Craigs List and there is still tomorrow so let's hope for more people!

Onto another topic: my health (once again). I went and had my MRI results told to me and of course, all looked ok. Bryan went with me and nailed the doctor down asking him what else can be done. He also asked him if it could be my diet. He has been adamant that it has been my diet the whole time. The doctor said it could be part of it, it could also be anxiety, etc. The nurse in the room said she had some of the same symptoms and it was partly her thyroid but also the way she ate. She gave me a handout on The Yeast Diet. I had suspected that yeast may be the cause of some things that are wrong with me but the more I read about it, the more it seems like it might be the answer. Problem is, with my diet it is so hard to get rid of yeast, to eliminate yeast, etc. She told me to do this diet and avoid all sugar and all yeast. You are not even supposed to eat fruit since there is sugar in it. No milk because there is sugar in it. No bread, no crackers, basically everything I like is off limits. There is no guarantee that this is the cause of my issues, because there really are no tests. You can do the saliva test:

I did this yesterday and I had lots of "legs." It was scary. The more I am reading about this, the more scared I am, but the more I begin to think this is my issue. I am going to see another doctor on Wednesday to get my thyroid tested more thoroughly. I pray he can prescribe something. I am doing a natural cleanse through medicine and drops and the drops are disgusting. Horribly disgusting. I am trying to cut out yeast and sugar but do you know how hard that is?!  Yeast and sugar are in everything. Even milk has a ton of sugar in it. This is brutal. I am not being fully strict which is probably not good, but I will talk to the doctor more about it and see what they have to say. It has not been fun and I am seriously missing my bread, orange juice, potatoes, pretty much everything I love. The brain fog has gotten worse but I read that can happen when you detox. I wonder if that is what I am doing. I hope I am getting rid of some of the bad things. I just want to feel better.

Back to the garage sale. Nothing is happening. Nada. I have sold about $50. The last time I did this, within the first 3 hours I had over $300. Stinks. Bryan did not want me to do this-thought it was a waste of time. Maybe it is but hopefully tomorrow will be better.

Thats about it for now. I will try and write more soon. These have not been funny entries at all :(

D

Dude, I suck at this

So the post about Road to Hana never happened. Lots of things don't happen lately. I really need to get better about so many things in my life but there never seems to be enough time. We got back from Maui, then it was time to get ready for New Jersey. We are having renters move into the townhome in a few weeks and I need to get my stuff out. Lots to do and not much time.

Before we were planning on leaving for New Jersey, I drove up to Ft. Collins to give our dog to my sister to watch while we were away. I was having stomach pains, but did not think much of it. As the night went on, it got worse. Then I got queasy but I managed to make it to a movie and get some rest that night. The next morning, I packed up my stuff and was headed back to Parker. I was queasy, hot, and having major stomach issues. This post might be a little graphic, but oh well, I am going to write what happened.

I drove back to Parker, and was not doing too well. I got back to the house and all I wanted to do was lay down. When I went to the bathroom, it was all black. I knew something was wrong. I did not feel right, and I still had to pack. Long story short, after talking to Nicole (hubby is a doctor) she said I should go to the doctor because if it is black it could be blood. I resist because it is going to cost money, and it was the first baseball game for the boys. Regardless, we went to urgent care which happens to be at my primary care doctor's office as well. As soon as we get there, she tells me she is going to do a rectal exam. Oh what fun. As soon as she finishes she tells me "Yep, all blood. You are not getting on a plane tomorrow." I sit there and sob because I can't go on the trip that has been planned for a long time, and I am not feeling well. I feel terrible emotionally and physically, and she tells me that it is an upper GI bleed. They take blood from my arm and from my finger. The blood count number from my finger is low, and she says to come back in two days to make sure my blood count is not so low that I would need a transfusion. She also gives me a medication for ulcers in case I have one. I felt like I got no answers. She was also waiting on more test results and said she would call me later that night.

We get back home and I am still not feeling well. I talk to Nicole's husband and he said wait for the results but if you don't hear back, go to the ER. We don't hear back so Bryan takes me to the ER. They give me fluids, take a CT scan of my stomach, check my blood levels and we basically get no answers. Here are some pictures from that night:

What I had to drink before the CT scan. I must say they have improved in this area. Last time I had to do this, it was chalky and gross. This was actually not too bad.

Reading the latest People magazine.

Since Bryan was leaving with the boys the next day, my sister came down and stayed with me.

We love our computers and internet so Denise was thrilled to learn there was wi-fi. She had her own little technology center set up in the corner.

 What they wrapped around my arm.

 Yep, that's me.

Eventually I was released with no real answers. Colitiis, a stomach bug, an ulcer? Who knew. It was frustrating. Two days after getting out, I went to New Jersey. So far, no symptoms have returned so we will see what happens.

The most shocking thing was the bill that followed. That little time in the ER was billed at $12,000. I had no idea fluids were that much money. I hope it included the CT scan. Even with insurance it was still a lot of money. I am starting to think my bad luck lately is because of this:

When we were in Hawaii, I took a black rock from the black sand beach which I come to find out later is bad karma. Whoops. Maybe I jinxed myself :(

Aloha!

Aloha people-if anyone reads this. I am way behind. Almost two months behind. Where does the time go?

As I write this, I am sitting on the wrap around deck of our amazing end unit room in Maui. I am in awe of this place. I heard Maui was nice, but this nice? I had no idea. It is stunning. Easily the most beautiful place I have ever been to in my life. Way better than Jamaica, and the best part? We are not paying for it. Yay for Bryan being so great at his job! There are about 334 people here from his company. The thought of what the company's final bill will be makes my head hurt. The resort is amazing. The island is amazing. I can't say enough wonderful things about it. I just hope we get to come again! I am so grateful for the trip we are having. Did I mention it is amazing?

I guess I will begin with the start of the trip. Our flight was to depart at 6 am from Denver to San Francisco.  As we are boarding the lady stops the line in front of us, and says there is a maintenance issue. We learn it is a carpeting issue and they just need some tape. All is a go. We get on the plane, settle into our seats, and begin to taxi. Then we stop. They say there is a warning light on or something, and they need maintenance to check it out. Well, we wind up having to go back to the gate, get off the plane, and wait for another aircraft. What does this mean? A missed connection that we had already been upgraded to first class on. I was expecting to sleep, but being in the middle seat did nothing for my ability to fall asleep (I originally wrote "my ability to crash" and thought no, crashing and being on a plane should not be in the same sentence.) My eternal optimist husband is certain we will make the flight, or that they will hold the plane for us. Some may say I am a pessimist-I consider myself a realist. We were already 2 hours late, we only had an hour between the flights, and YES, there was a small, slim chance that we would make the flight if they held it for us, I was not counting on it. The thing that made me nervous at the beginning was the lady told us there were not many flights available because it was the day after a holiday. I of course had visions of being trapped in Denver (well, we would not be trapped, since we DO live there, but I really wanted to get to Hawaii. Here's to hoping we get trapped in Maui.) My determined husband called the travel department and made sure we had seats on the next flight. We were worried we would not get upgraded, but Bryan worked his magic and got us upgraded on that flight too. We wound up being at the airport in San Fran for several hours. We hung out at a restaurant with Rich and Michelle, and then hung out at the gate. Eventually, we were on our way to Maui!

As we were in the air, the pilot came on and told us the nautical miles, speed, distance, etc. I look over, Bryan is in Excel typing all of the info into a spreadsheet and I am thinking Uh, am I supposed to care about this? Apparently, they have a contest to see who can guess the halfway time to Maui. As I sat there thinking, um, divide it in half the pilot says, "Don't just divide it in half. You won't get the right answer." Who sucks at Math? That would be me. Thankfully my husband did the work and I do what I am good at-handwriting :) We were off by 9 minutes. Oh well.

On the way to Hawaii, they have Mai Tais in First Class. Do I like Mai Tais? No. Were these any better? No. The lady saw that I did not like them so she kept adding OJ to them (the juice, not the felon) and although it was a little better, I still did not like it. Did I drink it though? Yes-it DID have a pineapple and a cherry on a tiki god looking stick. I think it was a mandatory part of being in first class on the way to Maui. 

For some reason, I was not sleeping on these flights, so I thought, hey, I will watch a movie. Well, I spent most of the time leaning in the center to SEE the movie. The guy in front of me had a ginormous head. 

Here is our flight attendant. (Stewardess? On board entertainment?) I LOVED him. He was flamboyant and fabulous. He made me smile and was so great. I wanted to take a real picture of him but I did He lives in San Francisco but was from Ft. Collins. He graduated from Poudre High School the year Bryan was born. I did not say that to him though!  When he asked me what I wanted for lunch, I said none of what he mentioned because I am so picky. He said he would check on any extras they have from coach. So sweet of him. It wound up being a spinach salad from Coach. Not the company-although they DO make fabulous purses, I don't see them being all that great at salads.  I appreciated the gesture, but to a picky chick, a spinach salad is just as unappealing as the some big fancy name encrusted chicken he originally offered me. Still very sweet. He looked just like Randy from Say Yes to the Dress on TLC.

One of the funniest things that happened was I told my sister Bryan was bummed because the President sat next to us on the plane. She texted me saying something to the effect of "NO WAY! Obama is on your flight?!" She was kidding of course but it was funny. We meant the President of the company.

Eventually we made it to Maui. We got our rental car and headed to the hotel. Here are some pictures from our FIRST room:

It was amazing!  We had a good view and it was phenomenal compared to our honeymoon room. We were excited to start the rest of our trip.

That night, we went to dinner with Rich and Michelle and the Pretzels. Yes, the Pretzels. What an awesome last name!  Since meeting them I am craving soft pretzels. I told Rick that (Mr. Pretzel) and he said, "I AM a soft pretzel." One of Bryan's coworkers (Vinnie Magnifico-yet another awesome last name) told us to go to Mama's Fish House for dinner one night. He said it is at the beginning of the road to Hana so I am thinking it was going to be a little shack on the road. I was surprised to see it was a very nice restaurant, in a beautiful location. Everyone but me had fish. Here are some pictures from that night. Note: I am not pregnant-the dress just makes me look like I am.

Up next: The Road to Hana.

More randomness

Words can't even begin to tell you how badly I want a doggy door. My life would be far easier and less frustrating. Mickey wants to go out all the time. In and out every few minutes. Does he go potty? Sure, but 99% of the time he goes and digs and chews on the bark in the backyard. So frustrating. Bryan has finally agreed to one. Now if we could just get it bought and installed. Ah, bliss.

Bryan made it back from Europe. He brought me a nice watch. The way he prefaced it made me think he got me some blinged out Rolex, telling me to not worry about the price of what he got me, he thinks I deserve it and he hopes I liked it. I did like it-it is a Tissot which I have never heard of, but it is practical and it suits me. It was very sweet.

I went and volunteered today. Camden seemed out of it. He told me Torrin screamed all night saying he could not breathe. C said he had a headache. I had his temperature taken but there was no fever even though C said it was really high. Really high apparently is 99, which does sound high to a 6 year old I am sure. I asked him if he wanted to go home with me at 11:30 and he said no. I think it was because I told him if he comes home he needed to take a nap. Who hates naps? They are glorious!

I used to volunteer from 9-11:30 in Camden's class but after reading groups I would sit there while they did circle time with his teacher, then they go to recess and to specials. I leave after reading groups now which gives me an hour to run errands before I pick up Mikaya and Torrin. I went to Wal Mart today and kept wishing I could be a coupon queen. I got the basics and went to check out. I only had three coupons but yay for a $1.50 less. There are never coupons for what I need. There was a lady behind me that had an overflowing cart of Lysol wipes, Tide laundry, white cleaning towels and about 40 bottles of alcohol. I thought man, she is going to clean like crazy. The cashier said hello to the lady and told her Brett would come and help her. I said she must be cleaning soon and the cashier said, "Don't even get me started. She has her favorite cashiers and I am one of them." I asked if she uses coupons and the cashier told me no and that she is in there three times a week. I asked what she does with all that stuff and she told me she didn't want to talk about it. Now I am wondering what the deal is with the mystery cleaning supply lady.

Man, these post are boring lately.

People tell me I am funny all the time. Lately I have not been feeling funny. I am not writing in a humorous way, I am just writing. It makes me sad. I also feel seriously drained and lacking energy to do anything. I had big plans with Bryan being gone to scrapbook, organize things, but nothing. Nada. Sure, I have cleaned toilets, cleaned the floor, vacuumed and did laundry, washed the sheets, etc. But anything creative? No. I have a strong urge to hang pictures, but I learned the hard way that Bryan is not a fan of me doing that. I did get pictures printed and put them into the frames. I hung one of them, but the other sit on the floor. I want to redecorate. I want to paint. All in due time I guess. I want things to be symmetrical when they hang on the wall, but this is too hard so I need to readjust my thoughts on that. I want our house to look like Pottery Barn. It is nowhere close. I envy the homes that do. We are getting new art work, picture frames, etc. Other than that, we are doing it a little at a time. That is so hard for me because I want things done all at once. I am impatient like that. What I REALLY want is a doggy door. Do you know how much this would ease my frustration with the currently not cute dog? He goes out ALL the time. I am glad he does not go potty in the house, but seriously, it is annoying. He goes out, comes in, runs around, then sits at the door again. He had mad love for the bark in the backyard. He is chewing on it right now. Bryan is against a doggy door because he thinks it is lazy and we have an alarm so we would need to figure out how to work it with the alarm sensor. He wrote me saying I can find out how to get the doggy door. That would be bliss. Seriously blissful. I would like the dog more if I did not have to let him out ALL the time. People invented doggy doors for a reason. I believe that reason was to make life simpler-especially for me :)

Bryan is still gone. He went to the Alps today and saw the Matterhorn. I have seen it at Disneyland but that is about it. I am glad he got to do that. After all, when is he going to be in Switzerland again? I thought I would love being alone for 5 days, and yes, it is nice to fall asleep with the TV on and get up when I want to, but it is weird being alone again. Funny how you get used to things.

Today I decided to take my fake nails off. I have had them on since January of 2009 and I hate going to get them done and I hate paying for it. I have tried taking them off before but I bite them. Thankfully, it is almost impossible for me to bite them with my bite blockers in and my braces, so I think I might be successful this time. I am cheap and I did not want to pay to have them taken off so I did them myself. I probably ruined the nail, but oh well. I hope they look ok after a manicure. It does suck having an itch with no nails to scratch it, but it will be nice not to have to worry about breaking a nail. We will see what happens.

Another random thought. The doctor upped my meds and I am exhausted. I am wondering if it is a side effect of the new medicine and the increase. I looked online and insomnia is a side effect. I don't have that. I want sleep. I think I need to go back down. I am seriously considering going off all meds (weening). I have been on something since I was 17. I don't know what I would feel like being off meds. Maybe I need them. I know I did when life crumbled in 2008, and in previous times, but being on this many things should make me feel good. Not indifferent. I am terrified to go off of them, but I guess I could always go back on them. I am not depressed anymore. Sure I have good days and bad days, but nothing like it was before. Is that because I am married now. I don't worry about guys and dating. The constant question of who, when and if I would get married is answered. Troubles about guys are not an issue and that was a HUGE part of my depression. My doctor says the meds have helped me so much, and compared to when I first saw her (After I went to "Camp"). Of course I am better. The end of 2008 was a total shit show. I did not want to be alive and now I would not even consider ending my life. Sure, life is not perfect but I have it good. Really good. So would going off the meds be beneficial or horrible? I do not know. I need to talk to my doctor about it. I have the major fog and I would question if it was related to the meds, but I am thinking no because this started in October and at that time I had been on those meds for 2 years. I am confused. I am scared. If I do get pregnant in the future, I can only be on Zoloft. So maybe I should try going off now and take it from there. I don't know what to do, but it is hard to believe I have been on something since I was 17. That is a long time. Am I feeling ok because of the meds or because circumstances have changed? I do not know. I am scared to find out, but maybe it would be amazing. Or terrible. It would save a lot of money though.

I sure can ramble. In the time it took me to write this, I have let the dog out 5 times. He is sitting by the door again. So annoying. I am off for now. Headed to dinner with my brother and his family, and my parents to the yummy pizza place.  Yay!

More Randomness

I like to think of this blog as my journal. I really think no one reads it, but it allows me to keep a record of what goes on in my life without having to hand write it in a notebook (which I should be doing more often, but I am a much faster typer.) So with this being my online journal, I might share too much information. Maybe inappropriate information, but hey, this is my life and I want to document it.

With that said, here is how my day went. I had to go to the doctor to do another pap. A few months ago, I had abnormal cells, and they had to do a colposcopy. Results seemed fine, but I had to get another pap today. I dread them. I always laugh because they have a picture of a field of flowers on the ceiling. Who is thinking they are in a meadow of flowers with their legs wide open? Not me. The nurse was saying it should at least be a picture of hot guys, but definitely not naked. We then had a conversation about naked men not being appealing. I said a nicely dressed man doing laundry would be a nice image. She agreed.

Eventually my doctor came in and did the exam. When we were finished, I sat up and asked her some questions about getting pregnant, if we ever choose to do that. I did not get dressed, I just sat up. She listened to my questions and before she answered she sort of sat on the counter. As she did this, she yelled "SHIT!" He back turned to me, she apologized for cussing (I did not care) and she kept saying, Oh no! Uh, what happened? She moves over and I see that she spilled the test samples (apparently they go in water now) and tells me they have to redo everything. Of all the tests I have to have redone, it would be this one. I swear these things only happen to me. Oh well, nothing I can do about it.

I asked her what happens if it comes back abnormal, and she asked me why I am always focusing on the negative. I get that question a lot. I guess it is my way of TRYING to prepare myself in case the bad happens. She told me they dont usually talk about it until they know, but I told her I was curious. She said the colposcopy would need to be repeated.  We will see. I so wish I could be someone who is positive, seeing the good in everything but for some reason, I don't. I wish there were a way to change that. Maybe I can-someday.

After that, I went and met Kathy for lunch at Boston Market. They have real plates now, and they take you to a table when you get your food. That was interesting. Nice, but interesting.

I came home after that to hear a message from Disney. We have been having conference calls with Disney about how we are displeased with our park shoot. They fixed a few pictures, but all they did was straighten some of them out. They said they rebuilt them but we don't see it. The top of the castle is still missing. They asked if we wanted a reshoot in our attire, and although that would have been ideal a few months ago, I have braces now and short hair. Bryan also pointed out how much money it would be to fly down there, rent a tux, get hair and makeup done, get a room, etc. Things I of course did not think of. So that was ruled out. We suggested money back. They said they could go reshoot the same angle of our locations at the same time of day we took our pictures and photoshop the top of the castle on the pictures. To me this sounded ridiculous. Isnt there a way to photoshop it without reshooting? How would they get the same lighting? Time change has happened, seasons have changed-it is silly. Then they asked what shots we wanted but did not get. I told them and she said they could photoshop us in to those locations. Um, I would know we were not actually in that location so I said no. We said we would love to do a reshoot in normal clothes at Magic Kingdom, but not sure when we could do it. I was surprised Bryan suggested this since it would still be a lot of money to come down. He did ask for a hotel room and mention free passed. She said she would talk to her boss and get back to us with an offer.

I called her back and the bottom line is they will give us a Magic Kingdom shoot after the park opens. They said they would give us $150 towards printing photos. I just emailed them and asked if we would get the same things we paid for the first time around (like the hi res CD) I also asked if getting money back would be an option so we will see what they have to say.

Nothing else really going on. I have time with Bryan and the boys gone and I have not got much done except get caught up on the shows that were on the DVR. I thought about going to Ft. Collins this weekend but I think I will stay home. I have most of the items priced for my craft sale-I just really hope that people come. I want this stuff gone. I really need to get back into doing things that are crafty. I need to get over wanting it to be perfect. I need to just do it.

I am really tired for some reason so I am off to bed. I might stay on a little while to see if Bryan gets on Skype. I wish I used Skype when I lived in NJ to see my family. Such cool technology-but I do think it would have made it harder to be away from them if I saw them on the computer.

Have a good night!

Randomness

I have no idea what I am going to write about, but since I am completely alone (minus the dog) I feel like I need to write. It will be all over the place, I just know it.

I am still in my fog which I think is due to the ear issue. I went and got a two hour massage (heaven) tonight with Edward. Granted, Edward is magic but man, is he annoying. He is one of those guys who thinks he is hilarious, and makes weird comments and jokes. I would not go to him if he were not an amazing massage therapist. He kills my back and neck but I need that. Do I need him talking in a British accent then talking like he is Irish? No. Two hours of someone rubbing out the massive knots in my back and neck is awesome. What would be even more awesome? Silence. Pure silence. Not going to happen with this guy. Ever. My neck muscles are so tight and I really hope it is the cause for my issues. I know I am going to be in so much pain tomorrow, but if it gets me on the road to feeling like my ears are clear, it will be worth it.

Before I went for my massage, I went back to the orthodontist. I had "bite turbos" put on my two front teeth so I would not be able to close my jaw preventing teeth grinding and my clenching. It worked for awhile but for two weeks or so, I have not been able to touch them, resulting in teeth grinding and jaw clenching. I went to see them today and they rebuilt the blockers. I now hit the blockers again-yay. Are they sexy? Heck to the no, but if they make things better, this too will be worth it!

Bryan is in Europe so I am watching shows I have on the DVR. As I write this, I am watching Extreme Couponing. I am in awe of these women. I questions who needs 318 boxes of pasta even if they are free? Won't the things they stockpile expire? Cereal for less than a dollar and free toilet paper? I am all for it. I need to learn how to do this coupon thing.

Another random thought about our dog. He is cute, really, really cute....or should I say he WAS cute. Every time we took him to get a hair cut, it looked like they only shaved his legs trimmed his ears and face. His fur was still 5 inches long. This is the puppy I am used to:

Bryan took him to Petsmart and complained about the hair cuts he has been getting and they said they would give him a real trim. He left him and when he went to pick him up, this is what our puppy looked like:

Uh, whose dog is this? Not our cute one. This dog is SO NOT CUTE. What happened to my cute and fluffy puppy? The one who trailed in twigs and bark in his fur? I want that puppy back. The kid I watch on Tuesdays asked us where Mickey is and who the new dog was. Um, that IS Mickey. They basically shaved him. Now that he has no hair, I noticed one of his ears sticks out, while the other lays flat. Interesting. I would be so mad if I were him. At least his hair is growing back a lot faster than mine!  Although I do have to say-my new haircut is SO much easier than it was before, but I will grow it out again.

This is probably the lamest post ever. My ears are feeling more full than ever. Maybe he did something to get things moving. That would be awesome.

I am lacking creativity and motivation in so many ways. I am signing off before I become even more boring. I think I will go watch me some Hoarders to feel better about myself.

I am not sure what got in to me today. I took the boys to Hobby Lobby. SO many things for Torrin to destroy in that store. He loved touching everything. They also wanted everything. I think I will be going to that store alone for awhile. Camden was interested in everything, which I love because that store is heaven to me. After that I took them to Pump It Up. Before coming here, I checked the open jump hours online and they said 10-5. At Hobby Lobby I told them if they were good I had a surprise for them. So we drove to the place, and it said they did not open until 2. The boys had been so excited but then we were all bummed. As we were leaving the lady ran out to us saying we could come in. The field trip that was here was not as big as they thought. There was an empty arena. Wahoo! They have tables now for the parents and free wi fi! Wahoo! I feel like a bad step mom sitting here with my laptop, but I check in on the boys, I can see them, and no one has cried in the 30 minutes we have been here. There are only 2 other kids here so it is fabulous!

If anyone does read this, I am sure you already know that I chopped my hair off. I love long hair, people compliment me on it all the time which is nice, but at a certain length it does nothing. Nada. Zip. It breaks, it falls out, and I wind up putting it back. I had intentions of donating it to Pantene since they require 8 inches. I also planned on donating it in May when I had more length but it is right before we leave for Hawaii and I did not want to have hair regret before a big trip. Along with my braces, I would not feel too good about myself. Danielle (my hairdresser) came to the house and I decided to cut it all off. She asked if I was sure. I wasn't but I said I needed to do it. Thankfully, I looked on the Pantene site and read her what can't be in my hair. Well, permanent dye can't be in the donation hair so Pantene was out. Locks of Love would accept it, but that meant 10 inches. I did it anyway. My fear is when it was in the ponytail it only looks 9.5 inches. I really, really hope they can use it. Even if they can't, I sure hope they lie about it.

I have gotten a lot of compliments on it, but I am not a fan at all. I do love that it takes no time to shampoo it and to dry it is so simple. Yay! My hair grows fast so it will be ok. Bryan loves it so that is good. I just feel bad about myself more so now with the hair and braces. Not a good combo, but there is nothing I can do, AND it will grow back. When I feel bad about it, I think I could have cancer and lose my hair due to chemo. This is nothing. As I was thinking that, I saw this story online and it really made me sad, and grateful at the same time:

http://www.nydailynews.com/ny_local/2011/03/25/2011-03-25_brooklyn_parents_in_a_race_against_time_as_both_diagnosed_with_advanced_cancer_w.html

So very sad. I went to her blog and her and I write so much alike. We would be friends if I ever met her. I hope they beat the odds. I also hope something like that never happens to me or someone I know. Perhaps that is selfish, but there is so much cancer in the world and it just is not fair.

Anyway, here are some pictures of the process:

Mickey is trying to get Danielle not to do it :)

At least she had cute polka dot scissors...

Here I am the next day. Plus my first public braces picture!

Oops, I did it again

Last year on our trip to Washington, we went to meet Bryan's grandmother and Aunt for the first time. After we checked in to our hotel, we went to the car and I switched places with his grandmother for me to sit in the front. As I stepped off the curb out of her way, I fell off the curb which resulted in a broken foot.

6 weeks later, I got my Air Cast off and broke the other foot the next day. The doctor suggested physical therapy to strengthen the muscles but I really did not pay any mind to it, thinking it was a string of bad luck. Well, this weekend we went to my sister's house for the night. Bryan went to bed before me, and about 10 minutes later I grabbed the dog and headed downstairs. I did not turn the light on so I misjudged the steps and my ankle went before I did. Lots of pain ensued, but I thought maybe I just sprained my ankle. I went to bed and did not sleep well because of the pain. It swelled up and is bruised but I did not plan on going to the doctor knowing how much it would cost since we have not met our deductible yet. But Bryan said I should go, so I drove to the Urgent Care and they take me right away. I see the nurse, I see the doctor and then I get my X rays. The radiologist tells me it is broken which is strange since I have never had anyone tell me the results right away. She said she is not sure if it is the break from last year-I do not think it is because it had calcified and was gone on the last X ray. I am pretty sure this is new. I wait and wait and wait some more to see the doctor. They tell me he is reading it. Um, the lady already read it, just give me the final verdict. He takes over an hour. I read 2 magazines, play Wheel of Fortune, Skee Ball and Scramble on my phone. I look over at the calendar and it a picture from Bellingham, Washington-the first place I broke my foot. Ironic. He tells me it is broken, I need a boot and crutches. I tell him that won't happen until later on since I live 1.5 hours away and I am not paying for a new boot when I have one at home. He says to get something on it right away. I don't listen :)

When we got home, Bryan offered to take the boys to Target and get the pain meds they prescribed. I am worried that it will be a lot of money, and worried it will make me sick as most pain meds do. I can't have percocet or Oxy Cotin-makes me so sick. They give me Vicodin which I am worried about, but thankfully no sickness and it made the foot feel better. Probably too good since I was walking around on it, not using the crutches or the boot. Today it felt good but now it really hurts again. I had the boot off and was icing it and elevating it. Bryan asked me why the boot was not on. I did not see the point of having it on when I am just sitting down. He was not too pleased with that so it is back on.

I hope to get an appointment with the Ortho tomorrow or Tuesday. Fingers crossed. I need them to look at the X rays from last time to compare them. I kind of would like a real cast so I could have more support but we will see what they say. At least now I wont feel bad for not going to the gym. I also can sit on the couch and watch my DVR without feeling bad. I can get caught up on emails and my blog. Yay!  Maybe throw in some scrapbooking if I get wild and crazy.

The boys are in Florida for a week. I had big plans of getting rid of stuff and moving things over here from the town home. That does not look like it is going to happen. Oh well, nothing I can do about it!

In college, my good friend Kate met Jeremy at a bar called Suite 152. I was there the night they met and for some reason I will never forget that night, or what Jeremy was wearing. He had on khaki pants and a blue dress shirt. He was smitten with Kate and later took her on a date. Kate was surprised that a college guy actually wanted to take her on a date. This was rare in college, but it happened and eventually an relationship developed which resulted in marriage. I was a bridesmaid in their wedding and it was a beautiful day. I always admired how in love they were, how happy they were, and how much he adored my friend.

Through the years, Tracy, Carolyn, Kate and I, along with our boyfriends at that time, all did things together. I have a lot of pictures of those times which included weddings, parties, sporting events, BBQ's, etc. When I lived in New Jersey, I flew home for the Christmas holiday and I was sometimes able to stay for New Years Eve. Kate worked at the Hyatt and every year she had to work late and was not able to join us until much later in the evening. We usually went to dinner before hand, and my boyfriend at the time was in NJ and Jeremy was without Kate, so we would always say we were each others backup date. Here is a picture of us one year:

One day when I was driving back to NJ from Boston, I got a phone call from Kate. She told me she was leaving Jeremy. I was shocked, but due to the circumstances surrounding her decision, it was what she had to do at the time. She loved him so much, and I admire her for her decision. Kate recently remarried but she still kept in contact with Jeremy. He was still in love with her and she will always remember the special love they had and all the wonderful times they shared.

On February 26th, Jeremy passed away. It came as a shock to many people. Although I did not talk to Jeremy except through Facebook every now and then, I still have many memories that include him. On Saturday there was a memorial. There were a lot of people there who loved Jeremy. We watched a slideshow of his life-so many wonderful pictures showing a life filled with laughter, good times and wonderful friendships. The guys he grew up with were all there. Justin flew in from Germany, Kyle came from Texas and his other best friends all flew in as well. During the slideshow, Kyle broke down sobbing. It was so hard for all of us to see. Seeing his parents hugging Kate was also emotional.  Despite what happened, his mom wants Kate to be happy and that was very sweet.

It is hard to believe Jeremy is gone. I hope that the good times comfort his parents, family and friends during this very difficult time. I am glad I knew him for the time I did, and I am so glad he loved Kate so much. Goodbye Jeremy.

After staying up at night thinking about how annoying those blocks that said "Photo not available" were on my blog, I tried something and it deleted them. SO flippin' excited. I tend to over think things and it took all of 10 seconds to get rid of them. Why I did not think of the solution sooner is beyond me. But they are gone now and I am thrilled.

Onto another topic. About two months ago something came in the mail. Something most people dread, but oh no, not me. What was it? Something blue and pink and thrilling....a jury summons. Many people would roll their eyes seeing this, but to me, it was if angels were singing. Kind of like when I walk into Hobby Lobby and Target. I had been hoping this day would come. I have been a registered voter since I was 18-it is about time. I take that back, I did get one back in the day but when I called the night before, the defendant did a plea bargain and we were not needed. Darn it. I had to postpose the first date because it was Bryan's first day back after our wedding trip. I picked March 8th and looked forward to that day.

March 8th arrived and I was hoping I would be put on a trial. Perhaps it is my love of all things crime related (disturbing? Perhaps, but it fascinates me to no end). I wanted to be on the trial and hear the Law and Order Dun Dun sound effect even though I know that would not happen. I know the trial would be something like people suing over a fence or something lame, but I wanted to get picked. I was supposed to call the night before to find out my reporting time, and I was so happy I was not dismissed before even getting a chance to go down there.

When I entered the courthouse, I was surprised at the amount of signs that stated no guns, knives, weapons and martial arts equipment were allowed. Uh, why would you bring those items to a court house? Seriously?  What kind of martial arts equipment? Nun chucks? Karate uniform? Colorful belts showing your accomplishments? I do not understand. I also wondered how much of our tax dollars it cost to make all these signs.

I went to the window and they told me they were not calling the 9:00 people yet. So I waited. Finally they called us into the room. We were given an additional questionnaire to fill out. It asked about what we do, what we read, how we learn about what is going on in the world, and what TV shows we watch. I am very honest so I sat there wondering, should I tell them I watch CSI? Are they going to disqualify me? But I wrote it down anyway.

I sat in the room for awhile. I was surprised at how people would answer their cell phones and talk loudly in a room of silent people. One lady forgot her daughter had soccer practice, she needed someone to go get her bag, etc. etc. We heard the whole conversation. One thing that drives me nuts is loud talkers. What drives me even more nuts is loud talkers in a room filled with silence. I looked around some more and I was in awe of how many men were asleep. It always amazes me that most men I see and those I know can fall asleep anywhere, at any given moment. I envy those people.

I did not mind sitting there. Bryan gave me the wireless card so I was able to connect to the internet. I had the time to sit there with no children, no disruptions, no nagging feeling of "I should be cleaning right now." The time was mine.  As the morning went by, they called people in groups of 25. They announced there were 5 trials, but then as time went on, they said 2 of the defendants reached a plea deal. I still had hope, but then more names got called, and my hopes diminished more and more. Finally, after about 100 people were called they said the remaining people were dismissed and relieved of the duty for 2011. I was so sad. I felt rejected. People told me I did not want to get picked, but oh, I did. Oh, and the cafeteria was having a special on pizzas yesterday. I keep telling myself it probably would not have been any good.

Being in that room and watching the video on jury selection and types of trials got me thinking that I should have studied criminal justice or maybe have been a court reporter. I can type like no other, and I am nosey so I would love hearing all the cases. I started thinking wow, that would be cool but then they said most of the time, it is electronically recorded which makes sense. I still think I will google how to become a court reporter. I might be bad at it because I would get so into the case that I would zone out listening to the evidence. I would probably say NO WAY! Or SERIOUSLY? Definitely not appropriate for a court reporter.

So there you have it. My disappointing day at the courthouse, where I was not allowed to bring in my drugs, knives, guns, weapons or nun chucks.

I am annoyed that there are pictures that say "this is no longer available." I wish I could just delete them!

Anyway, I am having a I hate Danielle week. I got braces on, I have sun spots all over my face now, my hair has so many split ends all the time, etc. I have only been able to eat bread since these braces hurt so bad. People said I would lose weight. With how I am eating, I think I will gain weight from all these carbs. I did not realize how I took for granted the ability to eat anything. I think I would be sore if I had normal braces, but I have what they call buttons on the inside of my back teeth. They are super sharp, and they are there so I can put a rubber band from my top jaw to my bottom jaw. I might have said this before. It cuts my tongue and when I wake up in the morning it is not good. Bryan got me a Dental Pik water flosser which is nice since I can't floss without threading the floss through which takes forever. I just hope it is as good as flossing.

Torrin just woke up from his nap so more later.

Braces

First of all, I suck at writing on this blog. I have to keep up. I need to keep up. With the brain fog, it will help me remember. There is so much to write about but can I find the time to really sit down and write without feeling bad about all the things that need to be done? The only reason I have a few minutes now is because Bryan is out going over the taxes and there is no one here.

With all the issues I have been having, and all the doctors I have seen saying my issues are all related to the jaw, I went ahead and got braces. Something I thought I would never have to do. I was proud I never had them. But if they help all this pain, it will be worth it in the end. Fingers crossed.

I went to the ortho today and began the process. It took 3 hours and it was interesting. Dental impressions which make me want to gag, and the sharp metal stuff on the inside of my mouth. I clench my jaw so I got two shelf like things behind the two front teeth, so now my teeth do not touch. Um, I learned that this is making it SO hard to eat. I am starving but even soft foods are hard to do. I keep hitting the shelves which are called Turbos. Cool name, not a cool feeling. The back of my teeth have "buttons." I wrap the rubber bands around the back and front of the teeth. You don't realize how you take for granted the ability to eat.- and flossing. This is going to be a challenge, but I pray every night that it will bring some relief.

It is funny how I thought my teeth were not that bad. Then I see the braces and the wires and it looks like a crazy railroad track. Who knew they were that messed up? In two years they will reevaluate the teeth to see if it helped the jaw. If it did not, I will need surgery but I am hoping for the best.

I go back in 10 weeks to have the wires adjusted. While we working on the teeth, I had a lot of sensitivity where I had my root canal. This has been constant for a long time but I thought it would go away. I have to go see the endodontist next week. Again.

I feel ridiculous, I am talking with a lisp, and I am feeling so unattractive. I think I might lose weigh though. We will see. More about something other than braces to come soon.

Honeymoon

Well, the honeymoon finally arrived and here we are in Jamaica. Time sure flew by as it always does!  The temperatures in Colorado were cold yesterday and then the snow suddenly came out of nowhere. Here is what it looked like at 4:30 p.m.:

The snow continued until the time we headed to the airport. Chad and Carly met us at the house, and then we went to Chiis for dinner. We hung out there until 9:30 and then off we went to the airport. The snow continued to blow and I was worried our flight would not take off.

We got the airport and nothing was open. Thankfully a security lady showed us where vending machines were. We wanted a Sprite-and the more that we realized nothing was open, the more we wanted one. We were on a mission, and the mission was accomplished.

For the past few months I have had the feeling of fullness in my ear, the feeling of spaciness, feeling completely out of it-the here but not here feeling. NO ONE understands this and it is causing me a lot of trouble. I feel like I am underwater, I can't really hear fabulously, and I am forgetting everything. Yesterday when we left, it had reached an all time bad. I know people say I am dramatic, and I know I can be, but I just wish someone knew what I was talking about. I am in a dense, deep, dark fog, and I can't seem to come out of it. Last night was one of the worst times ever, but I kept on trucking after Bryan made it clear there was nothing I could do about it and I need to stop talking about it :)

While we waited, Bryan was impressed with how many snow plows were working the runways. They cleared it straight from our flight to the runway, and at 1 a.m. we were off to Charlotte. The plane was not 100% full so we took an exit row seat. I did not really sleep so I was looking forward to knowing that we would be in first class from Charlotte to Montego Bay.

We got off the plane and it was 5:55 am. We were hungry, and since I have never been to Charlotte I was hoping there would be a Dunkin Donuts. There wasn't, but I thought I would go for another craving of french toast sticks from Burger King. No french toast sticks on the menu, and when Bryan ordered an English Muffin sandwich, they said they were all out of muffins. Poor Bryan :( I said, "Do you guys have french toast sticks?" Surprisingly, he said yes! They were yummy (or I was just really hungry). We ate, and then it was time to board for Montego Bay..... More to come later.

I found this article interesting. I will write more about it later :)

Huffington Post recently put up a story called You're Out: 20 Things That Became Obsolete This Decade. It's a great retrospective on the technology leaps we've made since the new century began, and it got me thinking about the difference today's technology will make in the lives of tomorrow's kids.
I've used some of their ideas and added some of my own to make the list below: Do you think kids born in 2011 will recognize any of the following?

Video tape: Starting this year, the news stories we produce here at Money Talks have all been shot, edited, and distributed to TV stations without ever being on any kind of tape. Not only that, the tape-less broadcast camera we use today offers much higher quality than anything that could have been imagined 10 years ago -- and cost less than the lens on the camera we were using previously.

Travel agents: While not dead today, this profession is one of many that's been decimated by the Internet. When it's time for their honeymoon, will those born in 2011 be able to find one?

The separation of work and home: When you're carrying an email-equipped computer in your pocket, it's not just your friends who can find you -- so can your boss. For kids born this year, the wall between office and home will be blurry indeed.

Books, magazines, and newspapers: Like video tape, words written on dead trees are on their way out. Sure, there may be books -- but for those born today, stores that exist solely to sell them will be as numerous as record stores are now.

Movie rental stores: You actually got in your car and drove someplace just to rent a movie?

Watches: Maybe as quaint jewelry, but the correct time is on your smartphone, which is pretty much always in your hand.

©Will D/flickr

Paper maps: At one time these were available free at every gas station. They're practically obsolete today, and the next generation will probably have to visit a museum to find one.

Wired phones: Why would you pay $35 every month to have a phone that plugs into a wall? For those born today, this will be a silly concept.

Long distance: Thanks to the Internet, the days of paying more to talk to somebody in the next city, state, or even country are limited.

Newspaper classifieds: The days are gone when you have to buy a bunch of newsprint just to see what's for sale.

Dial-up Internet: While not everyone is on broadband, it won't be long before dial-up Internet goes the way of the plug-in phone.

Encyclopedias: Imagine a time when you had to buy expensive books that were outdated before the ink was dry. This will be a nonsense term for babies born today.

Forgotten friends: Remember when an old friend would bring up someone you went to high school with, and you'd say, "Oh yeah, I forgot about them!" The next generation will automatically be in touch with everyone they've ever known even slightly via Facebook.

Forgotten anything else: Kids born this year will never know what it was like to stand in a bar and incessantly argue the unknowable. Today the world's collective knowledge is on the computer in your pocket or purse. And since you have it with you at all times, why bother remembering anything?

The evening news: The news is on 24/7. And if you're not home to watch it, that's OK -- it's on the smartphone in your pocket.

CDs: First records, then 8-track, then cassette, then CDs -- replacing your music collection used to be an expensive pastime. Now it's cheap(er) and as close as the nearest Internet connection.

Film cameras: For the purist, perhaps, but for kids born today, the word "film" will mean nothing. In fact, even digital cameras -- both video and still -- are in danger of extinction as our pocket computers take over that function too.

Yellow and White Pages: Why in the world would you need a 10-pound book just to find someone?

Catalogs: There's no need to send me a book in the mail when I can see everything you have for sale anywhere, anytime. If you want to remind me to look at it, send me an email.

Fax machines: Can you say "scan," ".pdf" and "email?"

One picture to a frame: Such a waste of wall/counter/desk space to have a separate frame around each picture. Eight gigabytes of pictures and/or video in a digital frame encompassing every person you've ever met and everything you've ever done -- now, that's efficient. Especially compared to what we used to do: put our friends and relatives together in a room and force them to watch what we called a "slide show" or "home movies."

Wires: Wires connecting phones to walls? Wires connecting computers, TVs, stereos, and other electronics to each other? Wires connecting computers to the Internet? To kids born in 2011, that will make as much sense as an electric car trailing an extension cord.

Hand-written letters: For that matter, hand-written anything. When was the last time you wrote cursive? In fact, do you even know what the word "cursive" means? Kids born in 2011 won't -- but they'll put you to shame on a tiny keyboard.

Talking to one person at a time: Remember when it was rude to be with one person while talking to another on the phone? Kids born today will just assume that you're supposed to use texting to maintain contact with five or six other people while pretending to pay attention to the person you happen to be physically next to.

Retirement plans: Yes, Johnny, there was a time when all you had to do was work at the same place for 20 years and they'd send you a check every month for as long as you lived. In fact, some companies would even pay your medical bills, too!

Mail: What's left when you take the mail you receive today, then subtract the bills you could be paying online, the checks you could be having direct-deposited, and the junk mail you could be receiving as junk email? Answer: A bloated bureaucracy that loses billions of taxpayer dollars annually.

Commercials on TV: They're terrifically expensive, easily avoided with DVRs, and inefficiently target mass audiences. Unless somebody comes up with a way to force you to watch them -- as with video on the Internet -- who's going to pay for them?

Commercial music radio: Smartphones with music-streaming programs like Pandora are a better solution that doesn't include ads screaming between every song.

Hiding: Not long ago, if you didn't answer your home phone, that was that -- nobody knew if you were alive or dead, much less where you might be. Now your phone is not only in your pocket, it can potentially tell everyone -- including advertisers -- exactly where you are.