Wedding Stuff

What am I going to think about when this wedding is over? I don't sleep, I am wedding obsessed. I am Disney Weddings Message Board obsessed.

Being a planner, I love doing this, and I tend to rush to judgment on things. I immediately started looking for a dress and within 3 weeks of being engaged, I bought one. I just hope I still love it when it comes in. It has been two months now so we shall see. I stumbled upon my bridesmaid dresses accidentally. It is not the color I want but the deal was too good to pass up, the girls all love it (or they are lying), can wear it again, and it looks fabulous on them! I have our invitations narrowed down to 3 designs. I would love to look online for lots of invites but I will be overwhelmed. Thankfully there are Disney ones, so I am sticking with the three I narrowed it down to. Bryan has his favorite, I have mine so we will see.

Bryan has decided he wants to plan the rehearsal dinner. I am trying to let go of wanting to control every aspect of the wedding, so it has been passed on to him. He has the guest list, a list of suggested places, and is running with it.

I booked the photographer and videographer awhile back and now I am having MAJOR issues with it. I booked the first photographer I heard a good recommendation for and was so afraid he would be booked so I booked him. Deposit paid, deals were made in conjunction with the videographer and all was well. Then I became obsessed with the Disney wedding board and learned of all the other AMAZING photographers. Crazy expensive photographers. BUT photos (minus the groom and my family being there) are the most important thing to me so I feel I need to switch.

I am stressed about the budget. I am SO incredibly grateful for every penny my parents are giving us. I never want to ask for more then they are willing to give because they are already giving us so much. I pray I can keep it within the amount that was given to me while still having a great wedding.

There are so many things that add up. 21% service fee, cake that is $9 a slice (the cheapest and I dont even like cake), ugly chairs that I desperately want changed but don't think we can afford, 6.5% sales tax, $4 sodas, flowers, etc. There are things I really, really, really want but I don't think it is in the budget. Like the Cinderella Coach. Call me crazy, but it has been a dream of mine but I don't think $2,700 for a carriage is going to go over well with the parentals, nor is it financially feasible. Will I regret this? Will I wish I had it? I know want and need are two very different things, but I really want that.

The reception sites had to be switched because of the amount of people that plan on attending. Therefore we will have our ceremony at the Wedding Pavilion, then we move to BoardWalk, then we move to Grand Floridian for the dessert party. This stresses me out like you would not believe. People are not going to have cars so I feel we need to provide transportation which of course is lots of $$$$. Also, I don't want people driving drunk in between the reception and the dessert party. When does it end?

I have dreamed of this wedding for as long as I can remember. I want it to be everything I ever wanted but that is a lot of money and can't happen. People tell me I am nuts, as it is one day in your life, but at the time of the wedding I will be 34 and I waited a long time for Bryan and this day. I want it to be great!

We have a planning session booked for July 16th. We get to go to the Bridal Design area, pick what we want, customize our menu, see the location, etc. A lot will get answered then-I hope. I wish I could have everything I want, but we need to win the lotto. I guess I should start playing the lotto....

Bad Idea

Only a few people know what I have done, but now it is time to announce it to the world. Or the 5 people or so who read this.....

Those who know me, know I would never get a tattoo. I love them, I do. I think they can be beautiful and cool, but I never like the same things for very long, so I can't see putting a tattoo on me that I would love 60 years from now (if I live that long!)

One thing I do love is the look of black eyeliner, perfectly lined on someone's eyes. I have tried countless times to perfect this technique to no avail. Then I was talking to the ladies at the spa and all of them had permanent eyeliner done. Um, what is that and how do I do it? Well, essentially you get your eyes tattooed and apparently I thought this would be a good idea. I thought if I could look like this, I would feel and look much better. Although they told me I should get permanent lip liner, I said no way. I don't want to have to wear lipstick every day!

Let's flash back several months to Operation Permanent Eyeliner Try 1: I was relieved to know there is a numbing cream that is put on your eyelids so you don't feel pain when the needles go in. I wondered why tattoo parlors do not use this. Anyway, Laurie puts the cream on me and guess who has an allergic reaction to it? That would be me. I swell up like a balloon, it stings like a mo fo, and they do not understand why as I am the ONLY person they have ever had who had a reaction. I decide to live with the stinging and go on with the procedure. I laid there for 3 hours, having needles poked into my lids and then I was done. I was told I would be swollen and SOME of it would fall off but it would still look good. Of all the people I have seen who had this done-they look great. Well, not me. It fell off in flakes and chunks and I had to have it redone.

Operation Permanent Eyeliner Try 2: Laurie said touch ups within 3 weeks are usually necessary so I say ok, let me go back, deal with the stinging and burning, and put myself through hell again. Guess what? It fell off again. So what do I do? Do I give up? No, I go back for....

Operation Permanent Eyeliner Try3: May I remind you I am unemployed and can't afford to do this, but I am already partially tattooed so I feel like I HAVE to do it. I swear this is the LAST time. If it does not take, I am done. Well, it kind of takes, but parts are missing, the bottom looks like I did not wash my makeup off the night before, so I go back yesterday for....

Operation Permanent Eyeliner Try 4: I SWEAR this is the last time I am doing it. When I get there, I swell, I sting, but I hope that this works...finally. Laurie asks me if I tan. I tell her no, not at all. She tells me that is why it is probably not taking. My skin has no mellanin (spelling?) She uses different needles on me than before and all I can do is wait and see. She did it a lot thicker but that means nothing. It always looks good and dark when I am finished, but then a few days later-it leaves me. So here I sit, super swollen on the right eye, hoping this time it took. I have to wait and see but when I woke up this morning, I was not happy to see flakes of black on my cheek. I refuse to have it done again, so I am really hoping this works. Fingers crossed. One of my ultimate bad ideas.